That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
