"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
