She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
