She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
