I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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