This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
