Don't you send me to vm
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize
