how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
