I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
