I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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