I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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