; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
