they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
the day after is always just damage control
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Panties = found
Randomize
