We should be called the Road Head Warriors
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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