If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
that may or may not have been my penis.
I'm really busy with my period
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