yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
