Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
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