I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Randomize
