I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
