I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
