I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Randomize
