Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
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