Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
