The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
