my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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