Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
