fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
