READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize
