yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
