I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
