love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
