they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
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