you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Your dad touched me again.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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