how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
