but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize