I bet he comes in French.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
