careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Randomize
