Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize