At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
