I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
