I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize