I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize