I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
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