People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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