i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
