she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
