True but thats because hes a fetus.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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