You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Randomize