Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
