i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
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