we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize